Urbanna’s ‘big brass’ boundary brouhaha: Part 5

Part 1 • Part 2 • Part 3 • Part 4

Part 5

The prayers of writers are sometimes answered even though they don’t necessarily attend church services. And so the very next day a terrible storm hit Nimcock County tearing across the land, uprooting trees and taking off roofs of many houses. And most conveniently helping Merrypen find a way out of the “big brass” boundary brouhaha.

It was said the next day that the storm had spawned a rooftop tornado. And in its direct path was the disputed boundary line between Admiral Peabody and General Von Klunck’s property.

The damage was sporadic in the land of Nimcock. The amazing thing was that the entire line of pine trees running from road to waterfront between the admiral and the general’s houses was totally flattened.

It was miraculous. It was almost as if God Himself had had enough of the silly bickering between the two families and commanded the forces of nature to bring about an immediate conclusion.

And who could doubt it? Every single tree was felled. Who but the great creator could have directed the storm on such a perfect path?

The storm triggered a sudden resurgence of religiosity in the land of Nimcock and it was said that church attendance doubled overnight.

The next morning the “big brass” and their wives stepped across the hulks of pine trees that were lying strewn like dead bodies in the field. They assembled together on the waterfront. There was no talk. They simply stood together standing at what was now a cliff and staring glumly at the swirling waters below.

Nobody spoke. What could one say in sight of such destruction? At that moment dear old Father Blessing pulled up in his car. He gathered the four around him and asked for all to hold hands and say a prayer of thanks to the Almighty for sparing their homes. He added a line asking for peace to return to these once serene fields but without suggesting that God had sent forth His wrath in anger for how these stewards of the land had treated His bounty.

It was quite a sight, the five humans holding hands with bowed heads and thanking God for all their blessings and that they had all survived the ferocious storm.

Father Blessing blessed them and departed. He hoped mightily that this would be the end of the sorry behavior from members in his congregation.

As for the big brass and wives, all four stared at the massive amount of trees that would have to be cut up and hauled away. They might have thought of replanting another line of trees. Perhaps they translated these chores into the question of how much money the cleanup would cost and who would have to pay for it?

Or perhaps any change of heart that might come about might have been inspired by religion? Who knows? But the admiral coughed. The general coughed. Fiona and Greta coughed. The once haughty expressions from yesterday had been replaced with meek and grateful looks.

“Would you like to join us in our home for a cup of tea?” the admiral said. Being of British extraction it did not occur to him to offer coffee, even though the Von Klunk’s were known to be of German extraction. (But you can be sure more than tea was served that morning and added to the tea served in fine China cups that Fiona put out for the foursome.)

It was like magic. “Let’s split the difference on the 15-foot disparity,” the admiral suggested. “We can share the cost of storm clean up, draw a new boundary line and plant a new line of trees. The general jovially agreed.

It was that easy. The two families shared the costs and afterwards celebrated with a party that included inviting the entire town of Nimcock over for a barbecue feast. There was great jubilation.

And peace returned to the tiny town on the Rappahannock River and life settled down to a normal (rather dull, but we like dull!) beat. True, it wasn’t quite as much fun without the daily hot flashes of information that so set the town’s people afire. But it was much nicer. Nimcock returned to the town we love so much.

And a deer was seen moving across the field that evening, holding his lovely head in silhouette to the west at the lowering sun, as if thrilled at the sight. But an osprey circled high in the sky casting that ominous shadow across the land. A squirrel dashing across the grassy knoll took immediate cover under a stash of golden rod.

The clouds floated by and the blue river kept on rolling gently to the bay, as if it would always do so — as if we would all live forever.

Merrypen bid her mischievous castoff characters farewell. As if she would not wake up in the morning and sit down at her desk, turn on her computer, and wish mightily that they would return for an encore.

But the characters that she so adored, in spite of their foibles and weaknesses, in spite of their stubborn insistence on raising mayhem wherever they went, she still loved them. Perhaps because they reflected how human beings acted on occasion, perhaps reminding us of our fundamental flawed selves, in spite of our best intentions, we hope to ever keep in mind good will for our fellow man.

As the sun began to set, that blue bird that we saw in part one made one more swing to a branch in an adjoining tree that stood tall in the fading sun, its boughs lowered as if in prayer. Someone sucked in her breath as the setting sun hit the horizon and slowly sank into the Rappahannock River in a sky of orange peel and rose hips and the promise of a happy day in the morning.

The next morning bright and early the sheriff knocked on both the admiral and general’s doors delivering a motion for judgment to affirm her claim of an easement and right-of-way across their property to the river. The lady had just purchased a home across the street and was suing them claiming she had a right-of-way to the river.

Which only proves peace on earth and good will to man is but a fool’s dream. And that lawyers will always get rich.

Conclusion.